Today, my son repeated something “funny” he had heard at school. He is too young to be fully aware that what he heard was casual racism. So I asked him: “What would you think about saying that in front of Aunty R.?” [Aunty R. is my best friend, and a woman of colour whom he is quite fond of.] I was surprised that he reflected and then did realise that she wouldn’t think it was funny.
Sadly, despite the diversity of where we live, racism is present in our community. (You may remember when I posted last Nov. about cleaning up swastika graffiti on our bus stop.) Only a few months before that, I was walking the dog and passed a group of boys (age 13-14) yelling at another boy across the street, loudly mocking his ethnicity with exaggerated fake accents.**
There are volumes written on race and racism, so I will keep this short and just about health, because that’s my lane. Racism in all its forms impacts health in two ways: Firstly, we rely on healthcare professionals from outside of Ireland to staff our healthcare service. Secondly, we know from decades of research that those from minority ethnic groups can often experience poorer health than the rest of the population. This is for many reasons. And this affect on health continues to impact their on children and future generations.
Months ago, my youngest was trying to tell me a story, starting by clarifying which of the multiple boys with the same first name on his sports team he was talking about. “The one with the dark skin.” He meant it kindly, with the innocence of a preschooler. “Sometimes children and people don’t like being identified by things that make them look or feel different. Is there another way we could describe which friend you mean?” Pause. “The one with the really cool hair.”
These are not conversations that are easy. And I’m sure I don’t have it right either. But I try.
**In a moment of uber-mammy-ness, I will confess here that I was compelled to say something to the boys that evening. DH rightly pointed out that provoking anti-social teens is pointless at best, dangerous at worst. But telling your spouse they are right is a much more difficult conversation.
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